Choosing a Christian Education

There is a cost, and there is a price – this is what I think when I am asked the value of Christian education, from homeschooling to private Christian schooling to Christian College. As parents seek the best “fit” for their children, each option (including “free” public education) has an associated cost; there is also a price paid when a child leaves their family’s faith in worldly pursuits. 

Christian education can bear tremendous fruit in the life of a child. Scripture is clear that the pursuit of knowledge for its own sake without wisdom and godly guidance has risks which could lead one off the path of righteousness (Genesis 3:6,7; Proverbs 1:7). This can be a frightening outcome for parents who are weighing educational options. What criteria should they apply when making the choices: Friends? Location? Budget? Are church programs enough to counterbalance the public school’s worldview? These questions periodically arise as finances and other life circumstances change but I ask parents to consider all the ways in which educational settings affect our children for the rest of their lives.

Scripture strongly cautions that teachers should consider their calling and the strength of their conviction before beginning the precious relationship to students: Titus 2:8 – “Teach the Truth”; Titus 2:7 – “You must be an example”; 2 Timothy 4:2 – “Preach the word of God. Be prepared… Patiently correct, rebuke…”. 1 Timothy 4:16 admonishes teachers to “Keep a close watch on how you live and on your teaching. Stay true to what is right for the sake of your own salvation and the salvation of those who hear you.” 

Compare these instructions and qualifications to the majority of teachers found in “free” school, whether Voluntary Prekindergarten (VPK), International Baccalaureate High School, or Community College courses where the worldview, lifestyle, and personal beliefs of the teachers are varied and diverse.  Are these people you want your child “sitting under”? Teaching is a very sacred trust. Consider carefully those under whom your child will sit, and the hours per day, week, and year that teaching will influence them. 

Rather than Christian Character being well formed by age eighteen (a long-serving mark of maturity), studies show that the adolescent mind remains heavily influenced and vulnerable through age twenty-five.

Exposure to the world’s values is unavoidable, but the tsunami of worldly values and thinking which permeates general education could cause your child to question and confuse what is truth as they are forced to choose sides on worldview, historical accuracy, life choices and goals. Instead of working towards content mastery and developing life skills of logical reasoning, public speaking and writing, our students may seek to fit into the “norm” and unknowingly adopt much of the worldliness that non-Christian education presents.

I believe that our children benefit from more time to mature and more exposure to loving, thoughtful, and well-educated teachers and professors who will guide them into truth as young adults. They benefit from having mentors who offer lifelong relationships with their students and take joy in their accomplishments as they begin to teach others:

““Hold on to the pattern of wholesome teaching you learned from me—a pattern shaped by the faith and love that you have in Christ Jesus.””

— 2 Timothy 1:13

PEP meets students social and academic needs by effectively combining responsibility and freedom, taking learning differences and needs into consideration in short- and long-term planning, and giving exposure to rich classical learning which supports higher learning. While the promise of Advanced Placement courses, Community College Dual Enrollment courses and other options can be attractive to parents while their children are still in High School, the trade-off for potential college credit may be the elimination of some core content learning in efforts to universalize the courses, and will certainly be absent of all Christian Worldview.  Students taking the International Baccalaureate curriculum know little of American History and Civics as these are not part of their diploma program.

No matter how the Lord leads Christian parents to steward the education of their children, they must include aspects which develop true accomplishment and wisdom from learning, not merely “checking boxes”.

While PEP students develop the logic, language skills, and responsibility which should accompany learning, we believe the Godly process of student discipleship is far more valuable than the GPA. I encourage parents considering PEP to meet with current students, their parents and PEP graduates. The maturity and courtesy we saw in such students impressed our family to choose homeschooling. With your student guided by the Word of God, the Truth of the Gospel, and with godly friends and instructors, you will find the cost was worth it, and the rewards far exceed the price.

Jill Dragiff earned her master’s degree from California State University – Dominguez Hills. She was a pioneer in the homeschool movement early on and also taught humanities in the private school sector over 20 years. She has been involved in curriculum development as well as advanced testing. We are excited to say that she now teaches histories at PEP East St. Johns where she is a well-loved tutor.

Preparing Minds for Action

Child Educational Choices: Christian Parents, Smile and Be Bold!

Way back in 1980, President Jimmy Carter, trying to make a salient point in the Presidential Debate with Ronald Reagan, remarked that he asked his 13-year-old daughter, Amy, what she thought was the most important issue of the day? She said, “Nuclear disarmament.”  I was only in college at the time, but I remember wondering, “Why is the President of the United States taking advice on governmental policy from his daughter?” That made me a little nervous; and it made Carter a bit of a laughing stock. He lost that re-election.

When I was homeschooling back in the olden days before everybody was doing it, people would stop my children and ask them if they like homeschooling. At age eight, one of my children would reply, “I really want to go to public school, but my mom won’t let me!” That was horribly embarrassing, but the truth is, God’s design is for parents to raise their children according to their own wisdom, not for children to raise themselves according to their limited knowledge.

Multiple choice (answer at end of article):
Prov. 20:29 The glory of young men is their ___________________.
a) wisdom
b) strength
c) knowledge

The frontal lobe of the brain is not fully developed until about the age of 22. The frontal lobe controls execution function, planning, reasoning, and impulse control. This is why juveniles usually cannot be tried as adults in courts of law. Research suggests that the decision-making capacity of youth is simply not equal to that of mature adults. Of course, we don’t need scientists to tell us that; the Word of God has already informed us of that in principle. So does common sense!

“Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.
”Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with a promise: “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.”
And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.”

— Ephesians 6:1-4

The Scriptural order of the home requires that the parents, the oldest, wisest members of the family, make the decisions for the training of the children (which includes the training of the mind until full maturity.) It’s natural for a middle school or high schooler to want to follow the crowd and “fit in” to his culture, just as it is natural for a five-year-old to demand candy at the check out lane. Parents are tempted to let the teenager make the decision on whether to continue Christian education or be educated under a secular system. Now, if the parents prayerfully decide it is in the best interest of his child to attend a public school for reasons of their own, the child can trust this is God’s leading and submit to their decision in a supportive fashion; but if parents just want to “take the road of least resistance” because the teenager will be difficult to live with if he doesn’t get his way on the education decision, then the child has a character issue that must be dealt with before he leaves the home. It can be a growing opportunity for parents and teenager.

“My son, keep your father’s command,
And do not forsake the law of your mother.
Bind them continually upon your heart;
Tie them around your neck.
When you roam, they will lead you;
When you sleep, they will keep you”

— Proverbs 6:20-22

Loving parents do want to listen to and consider the desires of their children, but when it comes to the training and admonition of the mind and heart, it’s OK for parents to make the final decision for their teenager’s education, even if the child initially protests, for this is right.

By the way, Amy, we still have nuclear weapons which have proven an effective deterrent to nuclear attack so far. And my child mentioned above now has six children whom they are homeschooling!

Answer to multiple choice question:
b) The glory of young men is their strength.

Mom and Dad, let your son move the furniture and chop the wood, but you decide how to equip his mind with truth and bestow godly character training to his heart. You won’t regret this in the long run. I promise you.

Winning the Education Game

The cards were dealt and the game was underway. After a few rounds, I noticed that Charleston Jane apparently had skipped my turn. What?! Not fair! She kept drawing when it was my turn to draw! 

“Charleston Jane! What are you doing? Did you skip my turn?” I asked.
“No, Grammy. It’s my turn,” she replied. 
“Why are you drawing more cards?”
“That’s the way you play Crazy 8’s, Grammy!”

I started laughing so hard. “I thought we were playing Gin Rummy!”

You see, before the game began, we decided to play Crazy 8’s. During the deal out, her brothers got into a fight and appealed to me to mete out justice. Thoroughly distracted, I started playing Gin Rummy while Charleston Jane played Crazy 8’s! Same cards. Different game.

In Gin Rummy, the object is to collect all the right cards. In Crazy 8’s, the object is to get rid of all your cards. Once my mindset was corrected, we started over. You could say that I repented.

THE EDUCATION GAME
To win at the Game of Life, at its heart, we must win the Education Game. That’s why Christians historically start schools. We learn how to live from who teaches us and what they teach. 

The Game Creator owns the game and makes the rules. 

The earth is the LORD’s, and all its fullness,
​​The world and those who dwell therein.  (Psalm 24:1)

To win the game, we play by His rules. Here are the rules. 

STEP ONE.
You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart (deepest motivation, desires), 
with all your soul (entire living, physical being)
and with all your strength (total resources of mind, strength, and wealth).
And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. 

STOP. LET THAT SINK IN A MOMENT FOR YOUR OWN LIFE….OK, CONTINUE… 

STEP TWO.
You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them 
when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, 
and when you rise up. (Deut. 6:5-7)

STEP THREE
Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of
mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; 
do not merely look out for your own personal interests, 
but also for the interests of others. Have this attitude in yourselves 
which was also in Christ  Jesus, who…emptied Himself, taking the 
form of a bond-servant…He humbled Himself. For this reason also,
God highly exalted Him. (Phil. 2:3-9) 

…AND GAME!
If we endure, we shall also reign with Him. (II Tim. 2:12)
“These things I have spoken to you, that My joy may remain in you,
and that your joy may be full.” (John 15:11)

SCHOOL CHOICE
So, how do we Christians choose who helps us educate our children? 
Look at the school’s (or college’s) ultimate goal.

U.S. Department of Education
“Our mission is to promote student achievement and preparation for global competitiveness by fostering educational excellence and ensuring equal access.”

Christ’s Department of Education
Whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God. (I Cor. 10:31)

The Great Commission of Jesus: “All authority has been given to Me in heaven and on earth.  “Go and make disciples of all the nations, teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you…” (Matt. 28:18-20)

Another word for “disciple”: apprentice. Will we trust our children to Jesus’ internship to prepare for their career, life’s work, their calling, whatever good work He has called them to do?

It seems upside down, countercultural. Our mindset must be to serve others, not ourselves??

The Creator of the ACTUAL Game of Life insists we teach His thoughts, His way, all day, every day.

To win the game, we play by His rules.
Whose game are we playing?

Blessed is the man
​​Who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly,
​​Nor stands in the path of sinners,
​​Nor sits in the seat of the scornful;
But his delight is in the law of the LORD,
​​And in His law he meditates day and night.
He shall be like a tree
​​Planted by the rivers of water,
​​That brings forth its fruit in its season,
​​Whose leaf also shall not wither;
And whatever he does shall prosper. 
(Psalm 1:1-3) 

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PEP’s Vision

To fulfill the Great Commission by discipling a new generation of students to have a passion for glorifying God through their ability to think as freemen, to reason biblically, and to discern and communicate Truth to all areas of society.

In Honor of National Book Month

“Employ your time in improving yourself by other men’s writings so that you shall come easily by what others have labored hard for.”

— Socrates

October is National Book Month. And, while a major aspect of PEP’s curriculum is providing students with edifying literature to read and analyze—from Plato’s Republic to George Orwell’s 1984—we must be able to clearly articulate the reasons behind our focus on reading. After all, as technology becomes increasingly pervasive, both children and adults are turning to screens rather than pages for entertainment. According to a 2018 article by the American Psychological Association, “less than 20 percent of U.S. teens report reading a book, magazine or newspaper daily for pleasure”. And, as that article was published four years ago, we can only assume that now, as technology has continued to advance, that percentage is even lower. Barely any teens want to read anymore, preferring to spend their time on one of the many social media apps jostling for their attention. And, if they’re going to pick up a book, it will likely be a more recent publication—something that probably has very little substance, but a lot of mature content. So why does PEP focus so much on complex literature when it seems like society has all but abandoned it? 

The popular children’s author Roald Dahl once said that “if you are going to get anywhere in life, you have to read a lot of books”. All educators should embrace this mantra in their teaching methods. Countless psychologists and academics have emphasized the benefits of reading, especially at an early age. In one study from the National Institute of Health, researchers even found that “reading strengthens your brain” (Healthline), while other studies have found that reading increases a child’s vocabulary and “reduces stress” (Healthline). Armed with greater thinking skills, children who read good books can become successful, eloquent adults. Furthermore, as well as providing cognitive benefits, rich, edifying literature will widen students’ worldviews and encourage morality. But if children and teenagers only read what is poorly written, they will not receive these benefits. PEP’s mission is to provide students with an excellent education, one that will prepare them to face a world that has strayed farther and farther from the truth. And one of the most powerful ways to accomplish this is through reading. By providing them with well-written, layered books, PEP gives its students an opportunity for development that many other educational institutions do not. Plus, by including such great Christian works as St. Augustine’s Confessions, PEP teaches its students to better defend their faith and articulate their beliefs. In honor of National Book Month, we want to emphasize our commitment to teaching quality literature. PEP embraces the works of literature that have been the cornerstones of a classical education, providing students with an education far superior to the norm. As National Book Month has come to a close, let us remember to read books that will benefit our minds, turning to the best writers of the past for enrichment. 

So, for the PEP student who may be wondering what the worth of reading such old books is, we have one piece of advice. If this article hasn’t already convinced you, keep turning those pages, and know that you will one day reap the many benefits good books offer.

Sources:

https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2018/08/teenagers-read-book

https://www.healthline.com/health/benefits-of-reading-books#prevents-cognitive-decline

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Information, Formation, and Education

By Allen Cagle

“What if education wasn’t first and foremost about what we know, but about what we love?”

— James K.A. Smith

Let’s play a word association game... when you hear the word education, what’s the first thing that comes to mind? Maybe it’s knowledge, information, tests, college or maybe even tuition! While all of these may be considerations, what if education was less about information and more about formation? Education, properly understood from a Christian vantage point should be understood as a subset of discipleship. I believe the measure of a good education isn’t merely performing well on a test. Education is about formation.

It’s possible to get so caught up in ACT’s, SAT’s, essays, and college prep that we forget why we started PEP in the first place. While we certainly want to excel in academics, I believe it is possible to gain the world (of knowledge) and lose your soul in the process. I truly believe our goal is more about formation than information. Simply learning is not the sine qua non. The goal is to see how information fits into the world God has created and have our hearts shaped into the likeness of Christ as we understand the world God has created for his image bearers to manage. What does this have to do with the disciplines we study? Math works because God created an orderly world. Science exists to showcase his awesome glory. Studying the nature of man in Comp and Lit and Worldview classes becomes meaningful as we understand God’s story of Creation, Fall, Redemption, and Consummation. The Bible warns that there are some who are learners, but do not learn what matters most, God’s truth (see Rom 1:22; 2 Tim 3:7).

I’ve jokingly referred to the PEP curriculum at times as the Uncommon Core. I simply mean to say that we intentionally do something uncommon - we desire to infuse the fear of God (true wisdom) into everything we teach. CS Lewis, an educator himself, said, “Education without values, as useful as it is, seems rather to make man a more clever devil” (“Abolition of Man”). We pray that we are not creating clever devils at PEP; we pray that we are joining with you to disciple your students so that they are equipped to speak truth in love in a world that needs to know the hope of Christ.

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Allen Cagle has served as the Senior Pastor at Sunrise Community Church in Atlantic Beach, FL since 2013. He has a BA in Biblical Studies from the University of Mobile and an M.Div. from The Masters Seminary (Los Angeles, CA). He received his Doctorate of Ministry in Applied Theology from The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary. Allen served in associate pastor positions in Los Angeles, CA and Mobile, AL before moving to Jacksonville in January 2013 to serve at Sunrise Community Church. He began teaching at PEP in 2013 and loves sharing his passion for God’s Word and a biblical worldview with teens. Allen and his wife Mindy have three children — Kate, Jacob, and Karis.

Time Management for Teens

By Joanne Mastronicola

Here we are at the beginning of a new school year. You’ve purchased curriculum, decided upon classes and bought all the fun organizing products to help your teen succeed in the coming school year.

Now you must decide how this year is going to play out. Someone will be deciding how much work must be accomplished in each subject your teen is studying. For a large majority of us, this pacing schedule is dictated by a third-party. But the day-to-day is up to us.

It is in the teenage years that we begin to delegate the job of time management to our students. And, rightly so. But one of the greatest things teens struggle with is time management. There are so many things that must be balanced – schoolwork, family time, sports, hobbies and now possibly even a job. So even though you’re loosening the reins, you’ll still need to walk alongside them as they navigate this new skill set.

Start by talking big picture. Break the day into three large chunks – morning, afternoon, and evening. Have your teen choose which of these two chunks of times will be school hours. They will have to choose times that work best for both your family life and their productivity time. Leave the third chunk free for other activities. Do your best to maintain these times either by writing out a large chart for the wall – or by having them keep a weekly planner clearly outlining these times.

If you’re not sure what really works best – have them spend the first three weeks of school keeping track of how they spend their time. Just like you did when you first started budgeting your money – write down where time actually goes. From there, your teen can make a more realistic plan. Remember that it takes at least six weeks to build a habit, so it’s going to be up to you to help them protect their academic time.

We, as parents, need to recognize that sometimes it is us causing the time management frustrations. We inadvertently overload our teens with coursework or activities and there simply aren’t enough hours in the day to get it all done. Take a hard look at your priorities – and let go of items that are unnecessary.

Teens also need to learn the art of tackling the difficult, or least-liked, projects first. Your teen may be great at getting Math done since it’s their favorite subject, but they always leave Biology for the end. This means that Biology is always looming before them – and when they get there, all of their energy has been spent on easier or more loved subjects. Teach them to put those more difficult tasks into the freshest parts of their day and get them over with. They may also find that they grasp the material better and come to love those once-dreaded subjects.

Teens (along with the rest of us) can also get overwhelmed when large tasks are looming. Show your student how to break the task down into smaller steps and then tackle one step at a time. If the entire list still looks like it’s too much, cover it with a piece of paper so that you’re only looking at one item at a time.

One of the most difficult things about time management seems to be those time-wasters. While we do need down time, we don’t need wasted time. I won’t spend much time discussing social media distractions as that is a whole other article, but we are all painfully aware of how much time can be eaten up by our devices. I recently reading a book by Tim Elmore and in it he makes the point that most new technology claims it will save time, yet it actually beckons us to spend more time using it. This is especially true of social media. We easily get sucked down the rabbit hole of scrolling through our feeds. Technology is not going away, so we must work to manage it. Spend time as a family devising a plan to minimize or compartmentalize your social media time. Be willing to make the same sacrifices with your devices that you are asking your teens to make.

While we are on the subject, if you haven’t already, you should consider a good internet filtering program for your family. Even though we are allowing our teens more and more freedom, it is still good to be “wise as serpents” in this digital age. There are several good monitoring programs out there to choose from.

As teens learn to manage their time and their social media, we need to be ready to administer some tough love. In other words, when they fail at something due to lack of planning or because they made some poor choices, let them also experience the consequences. Don’t adjust the deadlines and don’t quickly step in to take up the slack. Sit back and let them figure it out for themselves. It may mean they receive a poor grade, or they don’t hold up their end of the bargain in a group project – but they need to FEEL that. It is a great learning moment. One that will last much longer than the poor grade. And – if they manage to succeed in still getting the work done, or they have that conversation with a teacher and work out a plan – they have successfully learned the art of conflict resolution.

Recognize that you’ll be taking one step forward and two steps backwards at times. This will be a trial-and-error process as you figure out, together, what works best. It’s a process you’ll have to repeat with each of your children and each outcome will look different. But just like with all other tasks – doing the hard work now will pay off in the future. Here’s to a great school year as you build new habits!

Joanne Mastronicola is our Operations Manager and serves to support PEP from the big overall picture down to the day to day details. To the students who know her, she's “Mrs. M”, because let’s be honest… who really knows how to say her last name? She has a tradition of going on a solo trip on the day of her birthday which has included sky diving and going to Boston for lunch (yes, from Florida to Boston just for lunch). She brings a high level of excellence to her work while embracing the fullness of life along the way. We're so grateful Joanne is such an integral part of PEP!

6 Tips for Teaching Writing

By Lisa McAfee

Wouldn’t it be great if we could just follow a formula to teach our children to write and they would produce works such as Tolstoy’s War and Peace? Well, as you know, that isn’t the case. However, do not give up because you can help your child become a writer. Here are six tips and four writing curriculums to consider in preparing your future scholar for their composition classes at PEP.

1.     Provide an environment rich in learning and reading.

In order to write, you need experience from which to draw.  Get outdoors, go to museums, read books, have many, many, many discussions about what they have seen and learned. Through these opportunities your child will have background knowledge they need for writing.

2.     Find out what interests your pupil.

Have you ever had to write about something that doesn’t interest you? It’s difficult! The same applies to your student when you give them a topic sentence and tell them to compose their thoughts. Writing comes more easily about a topic that is an interest or a passion.

3.     Start!

If you are waiting for a time where your reluctant writer asks for you to let them write, you will finish the year without one single thing being written. Start with small steps and increase throughout the year. Always encourage, support, and gently correct.

4.     Practice!

Have your child continue writing. Some days will be harder than others, but the more you do something, the better you will get at it. You can help your scholar by having them create lists, funnel ideas down to a manageable size, create an outline, have a central idea, etc.

5.     Reteach if necessary.

If your budding writer is struggling with a concept, be sure to stop and help them. By laying the foundation and making sure they understand, writing can happen. However, don’t jump in and rescue because there is such a thing as productive struggle. Let them see if they can figure it out and offer guidance when needed.

6.     Set realistic goals and expectations.

Don’t make the writing assignment too easy or too hard.  Start where they are and help them move forward. Always be your child’s biggest cheerleader in their learning.

So, what are some curriculums that you can use to help your enthusiastic or reluctant writer? I have found these to be beneficial, with each of them having an incremental approach. All of these resources are ones that I have used or have been highly recommended by fellow homeschool parents.

• Jump In: Middle School Composition by Sharon Watson

• Write Shop: An Incremental Writing Program by Kim Kautzer, Debra Oldar

• Writing With Ease by Susan Wise Bauer

• Essentials in Writing by Matthews Stephens

Lisa McAfee knew from the time she was a junior in high school that she wanted to be a teacher. Teaching is a vital part of who she is and what she enjoys doing since graduating from Miami University. Lisa loves homeschooling and has a deep devotion to helping homeschool families.

Lisa is an alumni home educator of two sons and an Ohio licensed teacher. She has over thirty years of teaching experience in private schools, home education programs, cooperatives, and private tutoring. She has been assessing homeschool students’ work in Ohio since 2000 and has enjoyed seeing and reviewing the progress students make from year to year.

You may find Lisa at Schoolmarm Ohio.

Your Tweens & Teens Need Your Guidance Around Social Media

By Nina Roesner

I remember when my kids were little, social media wasn't a thing. The big concern at the time was how much "screen time" was acceptable. I remember talking in the early 2000's with one older, wiser mom who told me, "Letting your children watch TV unsupervised is like inviting a stranger into your home to influence their morals. You have to watch what they watch, listen to what music they are listening to, and know the families of their friends to protect and raise them right." We limited screens to an hour a day, and I made dinner while they either watched their shows or played their games so I was hearing the content.

Enter Instagram, Youtube, and Facebook.

We had strict rules around social media use, waiting until high school (yes, my oldest took a ton of teasing about this). We would openly talk about what friends were doing, and I soon realized social media put my kid at risk 100% of the time for being exposed to the dark underbelly of culture. Good things also, absolutely. But if I could do it all over again, I'd say NO more often. As you probably know, dealing with teenagers can be challenging. I remember driving off with the wifi router to keep them off the internet while I was gone. I'd give it back when the chores and homework were finished. As the years went on, they became even more mortified at my disrupting their internet access. And, consecutively, the entire world, even PEP, became more reliant on the internet. Every day was a battle on the front lines. It felt like the battle waged between me and the kids, but it was really me against the enemy, and the world's influence. That is nothing new, it's just taken on a different form.

Here's a piece of hope for you - my three are now 20-somethings, and they have said THEIR kids won't have access to social media!

We shall see.

The research is in - the bad effects outweigh the good, and the discussion is likely to be an area of contention. Here's an article from Mayo Clinic about the effects.

It doesn't seem fair that the last part of a child's brain to fully develop is the prefrontal cortex, the home of common sense. At a time when they need wisdom the most, their brains percolate in a slew of hormones and development until they reach 25-27 years old. And thanks to social media, our kids are being exposed to an entire world of which we aren't even aware.

And they aren't prepared to handle.

I write this to encourage you to STAND YOUR GROUND. Fight this fight. TikTok is FULL of pornography. Mental disorders are running rampant because of the Instagram (and other platforms) comparisons to seemingly perfect bodies, perfect lives, airbrushed acne-free skin and happy everything. And our kids think that's what they are supposed to have - but it isn't real.

If you have mutually respectful relationships with your kids, your battle will be easier. They will see your heart and if you involve them in the limit-setting, helping them understand the "why" behind your concerns, they will develop self-control in this age against social media addiction (or pornography addiction) by learning how to navigate it in the safest environment they will ever have - your home. If you model following the same rules you impose on your kids, they'll respect you even more - and it will be good for you, too. Kids aren't the only ones impacted by the damaging effects of social media usage. Wondering how to cut back? This may sound counter-intuitive, but there are apps for that! HabitShare is one you might try - inviting your kids into keeping YOU accountable also will build mutual respect in your relationships.

Happy parenting!

Nina Roesner is the CEO and Founder of Greater Impact, a Harper Collins Author, hosts the What to Say & How to Say It podcast, and is a Professional Certified Coach (PCC) with ICF.

8 Tips for Choosing the Best Homeschool Curriculum

By MaryEllen Lees 

If you’ve homeschooled for any length of time, you probably have accumulated quite a collection of curricula. I recently took a trip to Half Priced Books with two huge Rubbermaid bins filled with memories of bygone homeschool years. Even though I walked away with empty Rubbermaid containers, a smile on my face, and money in my pocket, I still have oodles of books sitting on my shelves! How is that even possible? 

Choosing homeschool curriculum can feel like standing at Graeter’s trying to decide whether you feel caramely, chocolatey, or fruity today. (Is there really a wrong choice when it comes to Graeter’s ice cream?) Ice cream is one thing, but when it comes to curriculum the task can feel much more daunting because the stakes, for good reason, seem higher. I’ve twice attended the National Homeschool Convention in Cincinnati, OH. Some people find the convention inspirational but the first time I walked into the vast convention center I found myself completely overwhelmed. Every textbook looked interesting. Every method seemed appealing. Every booth housed veteran homeschool parents voicing opinions about their favorite programs. The options seemed endless. And they all seemed fantastic! Which should I choose? What if I made the wrong choice?

I’ve now homeschooled for nearly 20 years, and I’d like to share with you some general guidelines that I’ve learned along the way concerning choosing homeschool curriculum. 

Tip #1: Investigate
Homeschool moms love sharing what has worked for them, and their experience provides valuable intel! Ask for the pros and cons of the curriculum they have used. Dig a little to find out about the learning styles and personalities of their kids to better determine whether their favorite curriculum might work for your child. Read curriculum reviews because they tend to include helpful, practical details. In my experience it’s nearly impossible to accurately evaluate curriculum through a few pages of an online preview so try to get your hands on the books, whether that be from a friend’s bookshelf or an online company with a generous return policy. 

Tip #2: Sometimes the best curriculum is free! 
If you have a preschool or kindergarten aged child, please do not run out and purchase the latest-and-greatest reading and math curriculum. You don’t need it! Cherish these early years, taking time to explore God’s world with your child. There are plenty of years to jump into spelling lists and times tables. Let your curriculum be trips to the park, library, and pet store. Take advantage of discount days at the zoo, arboretum, and art museum. Memorize scripture together. Let your child dictate and then illustrate a silly story. (Trust me, Grandma will love it!) Let your math lessons be trips to the grocery store. Read aloud. Read books of all sorts. Read. Read. Read! Those early years are precious and the time you spend one-on-one with your child will never be wasted. Best. Curriculum. Ever.

Tip #3: Lay a solid foundation.
This next point might seem to contradict what I’ve just said. Bear with me. Although the elementary years should be enjoyable and somewhat relaxed, this does not mean you should downplay the importance of laying a solid foundation. Despite what modern education “experts” might claim, your elementary-age student should be memorizing math facts and learning phonics. Don’t neglect English grammar, including the basic rules of spelling and punctuation. Look for a quality writing program that will teach your student how to compose a well-structured, stylistically appealing paragraph. Remember, the three R’s (Reading, wRiting, and aRithmetic) truly ARE the basic building blocks for every subject. A solid investment in these foundational skills will reap exponential dividends!

Tip #4: Don’t be afraid to alter course.
Particularly during the elementary years, I found it not at all uncommon to start with a curriculum and then switch after a few months of trying it out. Sometimes you just don’t know whether a curriculum will click until you give it a try, and the beauty of homeschooling is that even with all the backtracking, redoes, and make-up days, your kids will still learn what they need to learn. Don’t get me wrong. I am a planner, and it never set well with me when I felt like I had “wasted” days on an “unsuccessful” curriculum. Looking back, though, I realize that time spent learning with my kids, whatever the curriculum, was never wasted time. And remember, you always have the summer to play catch up!

Tip #5: Know your child.
Every child learns differently. The curriculum that works for one of your children might not work for the next. Be flexible with this! Do not “force” your child into a curriculum that isn’t conducive to his or her learning style. For example, some kids need to see and touch things for concepts to really sink in. Others may do very well with memorizing to music. Still others learn best while being physically active (like doing jumping jacks while practicing spelling words). When choosing curriculum, look for supplementals and suggested activities that seem to resonate with your student’s learning style.

Tip #6: Know you.
It may seem obvious that you should chose a curriculum that suits your child’s learning style, but did you know you should factor yourself into the equation as well? To effectively teach a subject, the material needs to not only make sense to you but also suit your teaching style. I’ve found that in my weaker subjects I need a more scripted curriculum but in my stronger subjects scripting absolutely drives me crazy. Some curriculum moves more slowly, cycling through and recycling concepts. Others move through concepts quickly. It's ok, and I would say necessary, to include your preferences in the equation when choosing curriculum. If a particular curriculum style drives you crazy, DO NOT try to use it with your child because your frustrations will bleed through.

Tip #7: Don’t believe lies.
Homeschool parent mind games can be vicious! Don’t believe the lie that you are going to mess up your child by failing to choose the right curriculum. Don’t think of yourself as a loser because the top-rated curriculum that came highly recommended by your veteran homeschool friend didn’t work for your child. Every child is unique. Every homeschool parent is unique. Could this perhaps be the reason there are so many curriculum choices out there?? You will make mistakes (every homeschool parent does) but those mistakes are redeemable! When you get three months into a curriculum and it’s just not working don’t keep pushing through because, “We aren’t quitters! I paid for this book, by golly I’m going to finish it!” (Confessions of this homeschool mom.) If it’s not working, change gears. A frustrated homeschool parent makes a frustrated student. The cost just isn’t worth it.

Tip #8: Reach out for help!
As you approach those middle school years, the task of homeschooling and choosing the “right” curriculum becomes more daunting because it feels like there’s more at stake. As my older two kids entered middle school, I realized that I needed help not only with teaching the material but also with accountability. I tried several options, from online classes to co-ops, and then landed on Providence Extension Program. PEP has been a great fit for my kids because it has equipped them not only with college-prep academics, but also the accountability and spiritual discipleship that’s so critical during these adolescent years. When we first joined the PEP community, I struggled not only with adjusting to the program but also with grieving bygone days of zoo trips and afternoons at the park.  I struggled with feeling as though I had somehow failed as a homeschool mom because I was entrusting most of their teaching to a source outside my home. Those emotions were real, but the lie that I had somehow failed them was just that– a bold faced lie! If you find yourself needing a program like PEP, don’t listen to lies! By endeavoring to homeschool you are accepting a high calling. There is no shame in reaching out for help!

If you’ve read this far looking for specific curriculum recommendations, sorry to disappoint. Don’t get me wrong, I have strong opinions on the subject. (What a novelty! A homeschool mom with strong opinions!) The thing is, after all these years of working through numerous curriculum options, I realize it’s not really the curriculum that’s going to make the difference in your child’s home education. It’s you. So, do your homework, try different options, don’t be afraid to reach out for help, most of all pray that the Lord would equip you to be the homeschool parent he’s called you to be, whatever choices you end up making. You can do this!

MaryEllen's PEP journey began in 2015 when she enrolled her boys in the program and accepted a tutor position in the Comp & Lit department. Over the years, she has witnessed the unique, life-changing benefits of PEP's academically rigorous, Christ-centered program. As PEP Dayton's Administrator, she desires to come alongside parents in raising a generation of Kingdom builders for Christ.

PEP utilizes a classically inspired approach to education to prepare students for their next step in life, be it college or career. Ultimately, we desire to impact both the mind and heart of each PEP student. By encouraging character development, fostering critical thinking, and inspiring a strong work ethic, we aspire to train a generation of disciples to further the Kingdom of Christ.

"There is no way I'd ever be able to homeschool secondary school" ... and other lies smart parents believe

By Donna Baer 

Cut any parent of a teenager and they bleed educational frustration: Bullying. Anxiety. Bad curriculum. Remote learning deserts. Dystopian worldviews.

Engaged, responsible parents yearn to provide the finest education available to their teenagers. In their ruminations, they will briefly consider homeschooling middle and high school--and then quickly talk themselves out of the proposition. Why? Because they believe lies. As a parent who homeschooled ten children in high school, I’m here to disassemble the dissembling. And no, I won’t promise to avoid puns.

Lie #1:

I’m not smart enough to homeschool the upper grades.

Wrong. You are smart enough. You graduated from high school, didn’t you? That means you mastered the material once, even back when you were more focused on Homecoming than Homer. Now, with your mature adult brain, you can master subject matter quickly. And trust me, you’ll enjoy it this time. With the perspective of age, Shakespeare’s sonnets or the elegance of the DNA molecule can recharge your soul.

And here’s a veteran homeschool hack: You don’t have to master all secondary school subject matter before you begin teaching your teens; you just need to stay one page ahead of them. Online tutorial programs like Khan Academy and Crash Course can refresh your memory or fill in your blind spots. And often, your kids will figure out material on their own and won’t even need you to explain it to them. You can do this!

Lie #2:

My kids would have no social life.

The truth of the matter is, your teens will have a rich, fulsome social life--replete with peers you endorse. Homeschooling is highly efficient, which means your kids will have abundant discretionary time-- a rare privilege in the teen economy. With that free time your kids can explore sports, join musical groups, perform in plays, join a robotics club, hang out with a chess club, or just forge deep, lasting friendships. As a bonus, you’ll have oversight, and will be able to help your teen steer clear of toxic relationships.

Further, there are AMAZING enrichment groups, extension programs, and hybrid teaching organizations that can supplement your homeschool curriculum and bolster your academic weak spots--all while providing your kids with creative, thoughtful peers. Imagine your teens bonding with friends over The Federalist Papers rather than Fortnite!

Lie #3:

I could never get my kids into college.

Repeat after me: I. Got. This.

Colleges LOVE homeschoolers. They fill their diversity quotas! Seriously, colleges appreciate how homeschooled kids can think outside the box and learn independently. Admissions boards have been evaluating homeschool transcripts for decades now. They know a good thing when they see it.

And if the thought of creating a high school transcript sends terror through your veins--relax. There are online templates. And coaching services. And hybrid programs like Providence Extension Program that will walk you through all the steps involved in creating an impressive, professional transcript.

Your teens can take all the achievement exams including the SAT, ACT, AP, and SAT2 tests, registering as homeschool students. With their rich extra-curricular lives, your kids will have plenty of fodder for the dreaded application essays. And it’s been my observation that, because homeschooled teens spend so much time in thoughtful conversation with adults, they nail their admissions interviews. There’s nothing more attractive than competence with confidence. 

Lie #4:

Homeschooling would ruin my relationship with my kids.

This is the biggest lie of all. Rather than ruining your relationship, you and your kids will go on a journey together that will bond you for the rest of your lives. When you learn with your teens, stretching and clawing and grasping to master material, you develop a teammate mentality. You empathize with each other. You each appreciate the other’s strengths. You exult together when you reach the “aha! moment.”

For the rest of your lives you’ll share inside jokes and literary references. You’ll send each other articles and music and witty memes. Instead of a superficial relationship, you’ll enjoy vigorous, fulfilling fraternity.

Homeschooling kids of any age is a commitment. It is also a profound, brief opportunity to set your kids up for success and teach them how to love intensely. If you’ve been sucker-punched by the lies about homeschooling secondary school, take a deep breath and take a fresh look. There’s an army of homeschool veterans ready to help you and to weep with you at the finish line when this brief journey ends. You can do this!

Donna Baer is an author and educator. She homeschooled her 10 children in every traditional subject, including AP classes, from prekindergarten through 12th grade—often using Great Courses. She also taught biology, geometry, and Spanish at Oldfields School in Maryland. She earned her bachelor’s degree in Biology from Brown University.

Donna is the author of Strong Happy Family: Unexpected Advice from an Ivy League Mom of Ten and The Bible’s Feasts: The Secrets behind the World’s Oldest Holidays.

She also created the Classical Sunday School series, a comprehensive K–6 religion curriculum that employs the classical method of education. 

A frequent speaker at education conventions, Donna has recorded a Teachable course on how to homeschool children from kindergarten through third grade. She also writes a blog that chronicles her passion for creating lifelong learners. All of her books and resources can be found at www.stronghappyfamily.org.

“You can entice kids to embrace their natural curiosity, solve their own problems, and revel in a life of discovery.”

— Donna Baer